3/26/12

Cowboy Kisses
By John Laneri


It was a Saturday night. A group of us from the Double R were celebrating at the Dead Horse, a saloon on the outskirts of Lubbock. We had just ordered beers when a cute little lady wearing jeans and a red tank top started circling our table.

“I’m selling kisses for five dollars”, she said in a friendly voice.

I tossed her a smile. “Cowboys don’t kiss. It ain’t’ natural.”

“And, why not?” she asked, as she settled onto my lap and draped an arm about my neck. “I bet cowboys are good kissers.”

“We are, but we only kiss when we have good reason.”

She fluffed her hair and offered me another friendly smile. “I’ve always liked rugged men with smiling faces.” She paused to look me over, her eyes going from my curly hair to my freshly polished boots. “You're exactly my type.”

“That’s good enough for me,” I said, as I pulled five from my pocket and proceeded to lay a big one on her lips. She sighed deeply, her softness pressing me close.

Coming up for air, I said, “Wow… that was great.”

“Was it your best ever?" she asked, playfully.

“I need another kiss before sayin' for sure. But, you’re better than Mildred.”

Her eyes searched mine. “Who’s Mildred, your wife?”

“No ma’am,” I replied laughing. “I’m not married. Mildred’s my horse.”

She smiled politely, as if she had expected to hear something more lasting, then she came to her feet and headed toward Charlie, one of my friends.

I settled back to work my beer, watching as she moved around the table, going from person to person presenting them her lips. By then, I was beginning see her in a different light, and I liked what I saw.

From time to time, I noticed her look my way, and soon, we were communicating something special between us. It was almost as if we had known each other forever.

Finally, she returned to my lap and quietly settled her head against my shoulder, her eyes going to mine. “I've never known a man like you. I could fall in love so easy. Tell me this is not a dream.”

Whispering, I replied, “It's no dream. What we feel is real.”

I sought her lips. She responded eagerly, the warmth of her caress overwhelming me with joy – that is, until the thud of boots stopped beside us.

“What the hell are you doing with my girl?”

Suddenly, she went flying off my lap like someone shot from a cannon. I came to my feet trying to explain her little game and found myself confronting fiery eyes and a bull neck. It wasn’t long before I was on the floor kissing a size twelve boot.

“Don’t hurt him, Big Jake…please. He's a good man. I was only selling kisses.” She reached into her pocket and shoved a hand full of money toward him. “See, I’ve already turned fifteen dollars, just what you wanted.”

He eased off the boot and reached for the money. “Fifteen dollars… that ain’t enough. I told you to charge these yahoos ten bucks.” He returned to me. “The lady’s worth more. How much you got, cowboy?”

I mumbled something unintelligible.

He gave the boot another nudge and growled, “I asked you a question, and I don’t have time to stand around.”

“Probably about twenty,” I replied quickly, using the side of my mouth to talk.

“Then, hand it to her – you underpaid.”

I did as he asked and felt the boot ease away. Soon, I watched him stomp out the door with her in tow. At one point, she looked back in my direction, her eyes begging me to save her.

Feeling a bit dazed from the ruckus, I stumbled about then turned to my friends, “What are you fellows looking at? She liked me.”

Charlie slapped his leg in laughter. “I've never seen a girl jump so high. I’m bettin’ you kiss like Mildred.”

“Maybe so,” I replied, “But, something special just happened between us, and I don't intend to lose it.”

With that said, I headed for the door to find her, even if it meant tangling with Big Jake and his size twelve boots.


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John is a native born Texan living near Houston. His writing focuses on short stories and flash. Publications to his credit can be found on the internet and in several print edition periodicals.